I felt as if I had burst into a cloud, droplets poured from my eyes. A mirror had been spinning in my head.
Then, I saw daylight.
At fastest pace, a storm of sand grains consumes me, my centre is invisible for a moment.
A forest was in mind. The dog’s jaws and eyes narrowed, seeking vengeance whilst filled with a ferocious appetite. Silence surmounted the whole of this forest. The animal’s features transcended every temptation of paradise and solitude.
The body of the boy lay there, his seeds flashed into dusty air. His internal red flood entered land and a vision of muscles and tendons took hold of me. Rocks were draped in green moss and branches stretched out, growing faster than nature’s stronghold. The tall, savage body swept up all in this world. The sky drew its breath, an icy reconciliation. A retreat was faint, and return of day would come.
Memory of this day, the more it strays the more it closes in on my heart. Unravelled by its edges, I do not get lighter in mind by repeating all of this to myself. I merely feel darker inside. I am no longer beside myself, I am beside the boy without seeds. He is more precious – more to me than I am to myself. He was made bitter, that day will never escape us. He is nurtured by leaves, trees, all around the sky which touched us. Never again will the boy be hindered by that dark embrace. He will be hindered, but by light I see now. He was revealed that day. I am forever grateful to the forest. We were united by the green of the moss on the rocks.
(credit: Pixabay image – Avenue Trees Tree Lined – Free photo on Pixabay)