Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore—
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a scratching,
As of something gently clawing, climbing up my study door.
“GO AWAY YOU PEST” I uttered, “… my TMA is such a chore!—
Go away”… I might have swore…
I swear to you that I was sober; it was in a wet October;
And the bluish monitor flicker wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Deadline hovering on the morrow;—vainly I had sought to borrow
From my fridge surcease of sorrow—gateau was a lucky score!
Chocolate crafted by a master, who could ever ask for more?
Well, peace and quiet I would adore…
And the sour, sad, scrazing squeaking of each crystalline panel
Irked me—jerked me up with irritation never felt before;
So that now, to quench the raging of my heart, I stood repeating
“Someone’s messing with me and my study door—
Someone is messing with me and my study door;—
I hope you know that THIS MEANS WAR.”
Presently my calm grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
“You…” in calmest voice I uttered “truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is that I was working, and so quietly you came lurking,
And so faintly you came clawing, pawing up my study door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you”—here I opened up the door;—
Darkness there and nothing more.
Deep into that darkness peering, irritation reappearing,
Wondering how to go and hunt the scratching culprit down to make them sore;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was a whispered word I swore
This I whispered, and the echo laughingly returned it “****!” from the floor—
I waited; listening, raging… but there was nothing more.
Back into the study turning, all the rage within me burning,
Soon again I heard a scratching somewhat louder than before.
“Surely,” said I, sighing, “Something stands now at my study window;
This is stopping me from eating; I should make it go next door.
I’ll put my cake aside a moment and this mystery explore;—
’I’ll give this noisy pest what for!”
I opened into pale moonlight, a shadow slip’t past, its eyes star bright.
A tail flicker shaking off midnight dust as he strode across my floor;
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with the grace of mannered lady, jumped inside my top desk drawer—
Pounced upon my notes on parachutes inside my study drawer—
Poised like a prince, and nothing more.
Then I let this feline alchemist remould my fury into grinning gold,
By its serious decorum as it curled inside the drawer,
“Though you look so comfortable in that lair” I said, “my notes are under there,
Shadowy, midnight, visitor kitten, you have such a pleasing snore—
But could you move a moment for…”
Purred the Kitten “Nevermore.”
Much as I marvelled at a kitten talking plain as I have written,
Its answer vexed, perplexed, and repercussions bore;
For there was a deadline hanging, and by now my head was clanging
And my notes were trapped beneath a kitten in my top desk drawer—
And that kitten really had a very pleasing little snore…
I took a bite of cake and thought a little more…
I woke, rested and refreshed, and looked astonished at my desk
All my notes arranged in order, annotated and yet more!
An email to my tutor—sent out from my own computer—
Gaining time for me to accomplish what I couldn’t before—
I looked around, then heard the sound of purring from my drawer
I smiled and tickled midnight ears, “We’ll be parted nevermore.”