From hiding to the Board of Trustees: nine years of rebuilding

<div class&equals;"fr-view"><p><strong>The moment<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>When I took my seat at my first in-person Board of Trustees meeting with the Open University Student Union &lpar;Open SU&rpar;&comma; I found myself thinking about the journey that had brought me there&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>To everyone else&comma; I was simply another trustee attending a meeting&period; To me&comma; that seat represented nearly nine years of rebuilding&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>It marked the end of a journey that began in 2017&comma; when my life changed almost overnight&period; Back then&comma; I never imagined I’d one day sit around a Board table&comma; contributing to decisions and representing fellow students&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>To understand why that moment meant so much&comma; I need to go back to where it all began&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p><strong>When everything changed<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Almost overnight&comma; I went from living what I considered a fairly ordinary life to living with a visible movement disorder that changed my posture and&comma; with it&comma; many of my daily experiences&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>At first&comma; my focus was simply on surviving&colon; constant nerve pain&comma; endless medical appointments&comma; and learning to live in a body that no longer behaved the way I expected&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>What I hadn’t expected was how much my interactions with other people would change&period; People stared&period; Some whispered&period; Some called me names in the street&period; Others made assumptions about me before I’d even spoken&comma; as if looking different meant being less capable or less intelligent&period; For the first time in my life&comma; I was judged before people knew anything about me&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>As time passed&comma; I received messages – sometimes subtle&comma; sometimes direct – that my posture would define my future&period; When I spoke about my ambitions&comma; I was told I should look for a job at the back of an office&comma; somewhere I wouldn’t need to interact with people&comma; where nobody would really see me&period; Those comments stayed with me&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>The physical limitations were difficult enough&period; I could no longer drive&comma; and everyday life required more planning&comma; more energy&comma; and more courage&period; But over time&comma; the emotional impact became even greater&period; After hearing enough messages about what I supposedly couldn’t do&comma; I slowly started believing them myself&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p><strong>Disappearing<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>My world became smaller&period; I withdrew from people&comma; spent more time in my room&comma; and stopped putting myself out there&period; My dreams never disappeared&comma; but I kept them to myself&period; It felt safer than risking more disappointment&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>One of the hardest consequences was loneliness&period; Some friendships faded because my disability made it difficult to be spontaneous&semi; others simply drifted apart&period; I tried building new friendships online&period; Many conversations were genuine&comma; and most people had no idea those conversations were often my only connection to the outside world&period; Sometimes people wanted to meet once&comma; and afterwards the conversation quietly stopped&period; Other times&comma; people were looking for something entirely different from friendship&period; And sometimes life simply became busy for them&period; I don’t hold that against anyone&period; For them&comma; it might have been one conversation among many&period; For me&comma; it was a lifeline&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Eventually&comma; I reached a point where I knew something had to change&period; There I was&comma; in my forties&comma; living with a disability&comma; back in my childhood bedroom&comma; with a world that had become incredibly small&period; Yet one thing had never disappeared&colon; my ambitions&period; If anything&comma; they’d become even bigger&period; Maybe a little unrealistic&comma; maybe even a bit crazy&period; But they were mine&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Even with my world reduced to four walls&comma; I was still dreaming about building systems&comma; working internationally&comma; studying&comma; leading projects&comma; and one day contributing to organisations that could make a difference&period; Sometimes ambition doesn’t disappear just because life becomes difficult&period; Sometimes it simply waits until you’re ready to listen to it again&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p><strong>What was still mine<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>I asked myself a simple question&colon; What is still within my control&quest; The answer was education&period; If I couldn’t control the first impression people had when they looked at me&comma; I could control the knowledge&comma; skills&comma; and expertise I brought into every conversation&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>After a few unsuccessful attempts at traditional universities&comma; I deliberately chose an online learning environment&period; A place where I could focus on learning rather than worrying about being judged&period; I enrolled first at The Open University in the Netherlands and later&comma; when programme changes meant it was no longer the right path&comma; I started again at The Open University in the UK&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Studying a Computing and IT degree entirely in English&comma; which isn’t my native language&comma; was already ambitious&period; Apparently that wasn’t challenging enough&comma; because I enrolled in ACCA as well&period; In hindsight&comma; that tells you almost everything about how my brain works&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>As I completed my first modules&comma; something slowly returned&colon; confidence&period; Not just confidence that I could study&comma; but confidence that I could still solve problems&comma; learn complex subjects&comma; write code&comma; and contribute something meaningful&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p><strong>Rebuilding confidence<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Feeling ready for another small step&comma; I applied for virtual externships and collaborative projects&period; During my first year&comma; I worked with around fifty people from different countries across three international projects&period; Again and again&comma; I naturally found myself taking on the role of project manager or team leader&period; That surprised me&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>For years I’d looked in the mirror and mostly seen limitations&period; But the people I worked with never mentioned my posture&period; They talked about how I organised the team&comma; how I listened&comma; how I communicated&comma; and how I helped people work together&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>The one thing I believed everyone would notice turned out to be the thing that mattered least&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>My teammates described me as patient&comma; organised&comma; approachable&comma; and someone who helped others feel heard&period; For years I had measured myself by everything I believed I could no longer do&period; These experiences reminded me to focus on what I still could&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p><strong>The election<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>As my confidence returned&comma; another opportunity appeared in my inbox&colon; the Open University Student Union was looking for candidates to stand in its trustee elections&period; Without overthinking it&comma; I registered&comma; wrote my candidate statement&comma; and submitted it&period; Before I knew it&comma; I was standing for election&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Looking back&comma; I still laugh a little&period; For years I’d been trying to become as invisible as possible&period; Then&comma; almost on impulse&comma; I signed up for an election where the entire point was to convince thousands of people to notice me&period; Sometimes growth doesn’t begin with confidence&period; Sometimes it begins with doing something slightly crazy before your self-doubt has time to stop you&period; It was exciting – it was also terrifying&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>I shared my story&comma; published photos of myself&comma; wrote articles&comma; posted on LinkedIn&comma; and asked thousands of fellow students to judge me on my ideas rather than my appearance&period; Every post felt like a small act of courage&period; Then something happened that I never expected&colon; I was elected&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p><strong>Sitting at the table<&sol;strong><&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Only afterwards did I begin to understand the responsibility that comes with serving as a student trustee&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Although I had the option to attend my first Board meeting online&comma; I made a different decision&colon; I flew to the United Kingdom and attended in person&period; Years earlier&comma; I had been told that because of my posture&comma; I should find a place where people wouldn’t see me&period; Instead&comma; I found myself sitting around a Board table&comma; contributing to discussions&comma; sharing my perspective&comma; asking questions&comma; and helping shape decisions as an active participant&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>That wasn’t just another meeting&period; For me&comma; it represented nearly a decade of rebuilding&period; Not because my disability disappeared&comma; and not because the challenges suddenly became easy – they didn’t – but because I finally stopped letting other people’s expectations define what I was capable of achieving&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Objectively&comma; it was just a flight and just a meeting&period; For me&comma; it was nine years of rebuilding wrapped into one journey&period; When I walked into that boardroom&comma; I probably just looked like someone attending another meeting&period; But I knew it had taken nine years to walk through that door&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>What surprised me most wasn’t simply being there – it was how much I loved it&period; I loved the discussions&comma; the strategy&comma; the different perspectives&comma; and&comma; perhaps most unexpectedly&comma; I loved engaging with people&period; For years&comma; I had been led to believe that I should stay out of sight&comma; avoid public-facing roles&comma; and accept that my disability would define how others saw me&period; Yet around that table&comma; none of that mattered&period; I wasn’t the person trying to hide from the world anymore&period; I was an incoming trustee – contributing&comma; asking questions&comma; listening&comma; learning&comma; and connecting with others&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>That meeting didn’t just mark the end of a long journey of rebuilding confidence – it showed me that I’m finally ready to step back into the world&colon; not despite my disability&comma; but with the confidence to know that it no longer defines what I can contribute&period; Perhaps that’s the greatest lesson of all&colon; the world I thought I had lost can slowly become a little bigger again&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<div id&equals;"zfWrap">&NewLine;&Tab;&Tab;&NewLine; <&sol;div>&NewLine;&NewLine;&NewLine;&NewLine;<&sol;div>