Insomnia, perseverance and community: studying, parenting and advocating while disabled

<div class&equals;"fr-view"><p data-empty&equals;"true">Insomnia shapes my life in ways that are difficult to explain to anyone who has not lived it&period; It is not just the absence of sleep&semi; it is the presence of everything else – racing thoughts&comma; sensory overload&comma; anxiety&comma; and the quiet dread of knowing the next day will arrive whether I am rested or not&period; As a full-time mother&comma; a full-time Open University student&comma; and someone living with depression&comma; anxiety&comma; ADHD and autism&comma; insomnia affects every role I hold and every ounce of energy I have&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Most nights&comma; sleep is fragmented or absent&period; My mind refuses to switch off&comma; my body remains alert&comma; and exhaustion becomes a constant background hum&period; Studying after nights like this can feel like trying to think through static&period; Concentration slips&comma; memory falters&comma; and tasks that should take minutes stretch into hours&period; Yet the expectation to keep going – to meet deadlines&comma; to show up&comma; to perform – remains unchanged&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>What keeps me going&comma; even on the hardest days&comma; are my children&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>My eldest son is studying full-time at university and is currently in his second year&period; Watching his dedication&comma; resilience&comma; and growth inspires me daily&period; He reminds me why education matters&comma; even when it feels overwhelming&period; My youngest son has been through more than many people realise&period; He is ADHD and autistic&comma; and despite significant challenges&comma; he continues to persevere towards his GCSEs&period; His determination in the face of difficulty is a constant source of strength for me&period; When insomnia drains me and self-doubt creeps in&comma; I look at my sons and remember that persistence does not mean ease – it means continuing anyway&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Alongside parenting and study&comma; I also share my life with three Maine Coon cats&period; Anyone familiar with the breed will know they are affectionate&comma; intelligent&comma; and extremely high maintenance&period; They need routine&comma; stimulation&comma; interaction&comma; and care – and they are particularly active during the night&period; When insomnia already has me awake&comma; their late-night energy can push exhaustion further&period; Yet they also bring comfort&comma; companionship&comma; and grounding during periods of low mood and anxiety&period; They are joyful&comma; demanding&comma; and very much part of the complex ecosystem of my daily life&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>What makes juggling all of this particularly difficult is how invisible much of it is&period; Insomnia&comma; mental health struggles&comma; and neurodivergence do not always look like disability from the outside&period; If assignments are submitted and responsibilities are met&comma; it can appear as though everything is fine&period; But coping is not thriving&period; Many disabled students exist in a constant state of burnout&comma; believing they are struggling alone&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>I know now that this is not true – because I reached out&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>One of the most meaningful sources of support in my academic journey has been the friends I have made through The Open University&period; Their encouragement&comma; understanding&comma; and shared motivation have helped me through moments where giving up felt easier than continuing&period; Sometimes support looks like academic discussion&semi; other times it is simply someone saying&comma; &OpenCurlyDoubleQuote;You’re not alone in this”&period; That sense of connection can make the difference between disengaging and persisting&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>This is also why community spaces matter so much&period; <a href&equals;"https&colon;&sol;&sol;www&period;oustudents&period;com&sol;ents&sol;event&sol;2472&sol;">The Wales Club Virtual Study Room<&sol;a> exists as a relaxed&comma; inclusive space where students can study alongside others without pressure&period; It is not a tutorial or a performance – it is a place for quiet motivation&comma; shared presence&comma; and understanding that everyone arrives carrying different challenges&period; For students dealing with insomnia&comma; mental health difficulties&comma; caring responsibilities&comma; or neurodivergence&comma; spaces like this can be lifelines&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Equally important is knowing where to seek formal support&period; The Open University offers dedicated mental health and wellbeing support for students&comma; which can be accessed here – <a href&equals;"https&colon;&sol;&sol;help&period;open&period;ac&period;uk&sol;mental-health-support">https&colon;&sol;&sol;help&period;open&period;ac&period;uk&sol;mental-health-support<&sol;a>&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Reaching out for help can feel daunting&comma; especially when anxiety or depression convinces you that your struggles are not &OpenCurlyDoubleQuote;serious enough”&period; But support exists because students’ wellbeing matters – not just their academic output&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Living with insomnia has reshaped how I understand success&period; Success is no longer perfection or constant productivity&period; Sometimes success is submitting an assignment after a sleepless night&period; Sometimes it is showing up for my children despite exhaustion&period; Sometimes it is reaching out – to friends&comma; to fellow students&comma; to support services – and allowing myself to be held by community&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>The Open University is built for students with complex lives&period; Parents&comma; carers&comma; disabled and neurodivergent students&comma; and those returning to education later in life all bring rich experience and resilience&period; By continuing to centre lived experience&comma; flexibility&comma; and compassion&comma; the University can help ensure that students do not have to sacrifice their health in order to succeed&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>I am proud to be a student&comma; a mother&comma; and an advocate – even when insomnia makes all three feel unbearably heavy&period; And if there is one thing I have learned&comma; it is this&colon; perseverance does not happen alone&period; It happens in community&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<p>Because education should be about opportunity&comma; support&comma; and growth – not silent exhaustion&period;<&sol;p>&NewLine;<div id&equals;"zfWrap">&NewLine;&Tab;&Tab;&NewLine; <&sol;div>&NewLine;&NewLine;&NewLine;&NewLine;<&sol;div>

Scarlet James
༺🦇༻ BSc Psychology ⚜ Championing Student Voices ⚜President of the OpenSU ⚜ Wales Panel 🖤 Mum ×2 🐈‍⬛×3 🖋 Poet 🤘 Metalhead 🎮 requiescatin_pace